Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Nine lives

I think that I have nine lives and right now I am in life five. Last week, we had a round of layoffs in my office. I knew they were coming and I knew who would be given the pink slip. I wasn't "in the know" as a manager or was told by somebody but I read the writing on the wall. See, I have been in this position before when you know that things are bad, you know that they are letting people in different offices go, you see the public financial reports and then whoop, here is another acquisition. This particular acquisition had a catch, it had a number of people who did the same thing and a few jobs that would not be relevant. We were warned that the top brass was looking for the best of the best. And last week, those who did not make the cut were let go.

It sucks to watch this unfold, seeing HR call people one by one and seeing them come out in tears and packing up their desk and heading out in less than 10 minutes start to finish. I have seen it four times before and probably will see it over the life cycle of my career. It sucks, survivor guilt I suppose.

Then to top this all off, our senior management was shaken up and the results have wrecked morale and stirred up the rumor mill. And thus began the chain of events, after the all of the layoffs; a few people quit. Our office when from a lively place a few months ago to a very quiet one. We lost staff to the other office and the lay offs. I

So where do I stand, I am safe for now and probably will be for a few more months. I hold a unique position in the company and right now I am busier than ever. It is not to say when I am done with my projects, they won't show me the door. It does say that I have to get a few ducks in order so that I am prepared to do what needs to be done for me. It has given me time to reflect on my job(s) and what I want to be when I grow up.

But at the same time, the opportunities are endless.

Have you been through a lay off? How did it affect you?

Hubs is doing much better, he saw a top notch cardio last week who thinks that this was an isolated event give the fact that Hubs is healthy. However, he does want to rule out a few things so the Hubs will have to undergo a stress test, wear a heart monitor and have a sleep study over the next few weeks. Better safe than sorry!

Thanks for your kind words and thoughts!

Friday, August 06, 2010

Our second year and our first adventure

Hubs and I celebrated our first anniversary this past weekend. It is so strange to think that we celebrated a year, in a way it feels that we got married just last week but, have been together for a long time.

We celebrated a day early with an indulgent dinner at one of our favorite restaurants. We had wonderful wine, a great dinner and a luxe dessert We even got our neighbors to take our photo, prom style. It was a nice quiet evening that we just celebrated our marriage. Sunday was the actual day and we spent the morning in doggy school. Rosie has been signed up for intermediate doggy manners class to work out some behaviors. After class, we picked up my gift for Hubs. a replica wedding cake. For our wedding we had a small cake to cut and had cupcakes for our guests. So I had our cake replicated.

That evening we had cake and sparkling wine with one of my bridesmaids.

But, that evening started one of the scariest moments of my life.

Hubs went to bed complaining that his heart felt like it was racing. He did not sleep and when he got up in the morning he was not feeling better. He took the dogs out and came back all sweaty and exhausted for a simple walk. He did not want to go to the hospital or the doctor, he thought that it would pass. So we went to the store and after he made it past the front door red and sweaty, I made him call his doctor. So right in the paper good asile, the nurse told him to go to the ER

After a quick trip home for a shower, to pack a few things and grab a sandwich. We have both been to the ER before and knew the wait could be a while.

so we got to the hospital and they took us in right away. Within minutes, he was in a bed with electrodes on his chest an IV in his arm and a bunch of nurses and a doctor in his "room". His heart was in a fib. His heart was at 177-200 beat a minute! A normal heart is around 77-89. They started to rush around him adding meds to his IV and talking him through the process. We all stood by the monitor watching the numbers work their way down. At the same time, his blood pressure dropped. So they slowed down the med and he was made to lay down.

It seemed like an eternity before the numbers started to get into the normal range but, reality was only a few minutes. They had to give him a does a blood thinner to prevent clots due to his low BP. This gained him admission to the hospital. Once stabilized, he began to make jokes with the nurses and the doctors and tried to make me laugh.

I was so afraid, I could not believe what was happening. I got scared and began to get tears in my eyes. There was no way I could lose him, there was no way, we were just starting. He assured me that he was not going anywhere! He began to tease me how he always promised me adventure and I teased him that he had to stick around to kill bugs and reach the high shelves.

He got a room a few hours later and I went home to grab a few things for him. He stayed in the hospital for a few days for observation and got released on Wednesday evening. His brother and sister in law came by to visit, our neighbors took care of our dogs in the evenings so I could be with Hubs and our phone and facebook had messages of support from our friends and family.

He got released with orders to see the cardiologist. The doctors could not find a reason why this happened but we just have to make sure it does not happen again. So he is not allowed coffee or booze and is on some meds.

So our first week of our second year together began with a wild adventure. I told him that this is the worst that I will allow this year to be so only good things from now on. We made it through this together, he leaned on me, and I had to be brave. He always promised me an adventure, and together we will face it all.

Happy anniversary, babe. For better and worse, in sickness and in health. I love you always.