Sunday, December 30, 2012

Another revolution around the sun

As I look back at 2012 there is no one word to describe it.  It started off with a lot of  worry because I was unemployed and my one offer dried up.  But everything happens for a reason, and a week later I had an interview and he liked me, a lot.   But, for six weeks I was in Limbo with HR calling or emailing me every day that "I was still a candidate". Finally, the second week of March, I had my second interview and two days later the job.

Looking back, I can see how this job was a good fit for me and why the universe waited so long.  Granted during the long 50 weeks, I was not as patient.  My new job is great, I work on a fab team and have learned so much.  Plus the room for growth is just knocking at my door.

While starting a new job was hte highlight of the year.  There were some twists and turns personally (more on that later) but, it really showed me how lucky I am to be married to my husband.  He was my rock, my voice of reason and a source of positivity (if not a few bad jokes).

 It taught me how different we are and how we communicate and plan.  He is a waffle, full of separate compartments and can focus on one square at a time.  I am a pancake all mixed up with thoughts here there and everywhere.  But this realization opened some new doors for us and our marriage is stronger than ever.

I have neglected this blog but,  2013 will be an other new adventure and I look forward to sharing it.

So to all that are still there, Happy New Year!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

A fearless rotation around the sun

There are dates on the calendar that make you navel gaze, New Year's, anniversaries and birthdays.

Yesterday was my birthday and it was low key a lovely.  Last year I spent my day learning to paddle board and floating in the Pacific ocean, yesterday I had a number of meetings, conference calls and dealing with a major project crisis.  While I would have loved to be back floating under the palm trees, I am glad I spent my birthday at work.  It has nearly been six months since I started and each day I am glad that I have an office to drive to and more importantly a pay check that magically appears every other week.

My job is not perfect but, every day I learn something new.  I was welcomed into the fold by my team mates and work with some smart people.  But the best part was my recent review where my boss said that I am fearless that I jumped in and did not look back, that I make the job look easy even though it is not.

how freaking awesome is that to be called fearless!

So "fearless" is my word for this next rotation around the sun.  So here I come!

Monday, August 06, 2012

Another summer

Summer has been turning into a whirlwind and I can't complain.  We have packed our weekends with BBQs, parties, girls nights out, dinner with friends and just hanging out having a few drinks with our neighbors.  T and I looked at each other last week and decided that we need to make time and just sit with our feet in the sand and finally spent an afternoon on the beach!

While there has been the good there has been some sad, there has been some friends who have experienced loss, some illness and some loss.  I have had some downs that hit me but, I had too much going on than sit and worried.  As things start to wind down, I am facing a situation that I just need to face and deal with but, I have been dealing with it better this year than I would have last.  While my job is not perfect, it has given me an outlet to do what I do best and I am being appreciated and complimented.  Since I am not having to worry about  finding a job or what it means if I don't have one, I can focus more energy on looking at things differently.

I find myself more forgiving (especially of my faults and "sins"), appreciating my family, appreciating those friends, pushing out of my comfort zone and just more accepting of fate.

I can't say how long my zen will last but, It is a good place to be right now.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Just a peek into summer

I look back at last year or last summer and this summer and I am just so happier here and now.  The job is going great, I have got a number of '"good jobs" form co-workers and my boss that I feel like I am contributing to the team and the company.  I am still trying to grasp it all but, I have learned that you can't see the entire picture or you will go cross eyed, you just have to break it out by sections.  

I am enjoying my summer a lot more even if it is just two days weekends.  We have been spending time out like seeing Kevin Smith and Stephen Merchant.  Or outside, eating dinner on our porch with our neighbors until it is pitch black.  My little garden is looking pretty and well basically is not dead yet.

We have a lot to look forward this summer and I finally feel up for it.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

And the slow race through summer begins

We have been having many whirlwind weekends, the kind where you can't really catch your breath.  It is hard to cram so many things in a two day period.  This past weekend, after talking about it for years (really two years) we finally painted our bedroom.  We have been looking for the perfect for us gray and we finally found it.  So in two and a half days we painted, touched up, painted the baseboards, touched up and moved most of the stuff back in.  Granted we also spent time hanging out on the back porches with our neighbors and may have gone to a wine tasting event during the days too.

We have accumulated so much stuff and I am in such a purge mood that not everything that was in our bedroom is back, we have a few piles in our living room of things to go through and keep or toss.  I am getting a bit stressed because my house is not put back together.  I feel like a mini hoarder right now.

But you can only eat an elephant one bite at a time and so we will have it all done by this weekend.

It is just the start of summer for us.  We are planning what we want to do, concert tickets have been purchased, trip discussions are still in discussion, annual BBQ party are being planned.  Plus there is always going to be time for the unexpected event that pop up.

I am ready for summer

Are you excited for summer, what are your plans?

Sunday, April 29, 2012


I was given this award from KT

1.       Share who gave you this award with a link back to their blog
2.       Write down 7 random facts about yourself.
3.       Give this award to 15 other bloggers.
4.       Let them know they have won.
5.       Pop the award on your blog.

So as far as my 7 random facts:

1-I don't eat seafood nor fish.  If it lived a portion of its existence in water, I don't eat it.  I had some bad experiences as a kid when it came to seafood and that colored my view.  I can't stand the smell or site of fish, my husband can only make fish when I am not home and has to do his dishes before I get home.  It has turned into a joke between us.

2-I have never read the Twilight books, Hunger Games nor Harry Potter.  The first two did not appeal to me but I do want to read Harry Potter.  The reason I have not read it so far is that I have no patience to wait for new book so I wanted to read the series back to back.  I plan to read the series soon, there is a particular method to the madness.

3-My dream is to have a bunch of animals, not just a few more dogs or cats but I really want a pig, a pygmy goat and a mini horse.  My father still tells a story about when I was about 2 they took me to a petting zoo and I fell in love with the pigs.  Apparently, I cried all the way from CT to NY because I had to leave the piglets at the farm.

4-I can organize other people's things but when it comes to organizing my stuff I get so overwhelmed. I have to get over that so I can re-my closet.  I think I need someone else to bounce a few ideas off of to kick it into gear.

5-I love to plan vacations, when we went on our honeymoon I had things planned, places to visit and areas to explore.  But when we went to Hawaii both times, the planning was more laid back.  We did a bunch of fun things but spent a lot of time just sitting on by the pool or beach.  My family vacations were always go go go, we never had a relaxing vacation so it was hard to get used to.  So we are planning vacation 2012 so many places to consider!

6-My latest beauty obsession is nail polish.  I have been splurging on a few colors and have been painting my nails every week.

7-Since i started my job, i have started to miss hitting the gym.  Granted my company has a gym but my days are hectic.  On average I have three meetings a day, one day last week I had seven.  So trying to find time during the day is tough.  But once I get my laptop, I will have so much more flexibility!!

As far as passing it on, I pass it on to you, those few that still read me.  Thank you for reading over these past few years, lately i have been quieter than I used to be.  So thanks for sticking by me!

Saturday, April 21, 2012


Chicago readers, what are you doing next Saturday.  How about coming to see this amazing dance troupe preform with some of their students and other dance troupes.  Piel Morena will be debuting a new piece that I personally can not wait to see.

The theme of the evening is what is essence?  What makes essence a part of us, the human experience, as individual and as part of a culture.

Tickets are only 15 dollars and can be purchased here and if you do go, please let me know so that I can say hi!

But in the meantime, how do you define essence?

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

These past weeks

It has been a busy three weeks just getting back into the swing of things and finding a routine and the weekends have been packed with the combo of errands, chores and fun activities.

These past few weeks we have been working to find the balance of work and life activities.  I have been in the "get organized" mood and have been thinking up plans to get things taken care of.  On top of the  thins we are planning to do around the house.  We finally got a screen door installed last weeks and are going to paint our bedroom and possibly the living room.  So we are narrowing down the colors and the weekend in which to get it done.

Working has given me such motivation to do things especially the ones that have been on the 'to-do list" for a while.

It is getting exciting, I am feeling inspired.

Monday, April 02, 2012

Week one

I was so excited last week to get back into the swing of working again.  I thought that I would be more nervous but really, I could not wait to get back to work.  The office complex that I now work in is huge like 12 buildings huge spread out.  In the summer they have a rent a bike to bike to the various offices around the campus!

My new building was also a bit of a challenge to get used to and find my way from my desk to the cafeteria or the conference rooms.  The first two days I got lost leaving the office and trying to find the right parking lot.  Since then , I carpool with my husband since he works 10 minutes away and only have to worry about finding my way out well the days he does not work from home.

Overall, I still feel like the newbie but, my team was been very welcoming, my boss has been more like a mentor than a boss and I am feeling thankful and lucky that I landed this position.  The company is great, the benefits are 'slap your momma' good and I am working again and that feeling is priceless.

I am ready to get my hands dirty, to learn about an entirely new industry and just go.  So far my week shave been filled with meetings and training sessions, I have not had any downtime but I love that!  The culture is so night and day from my last place, it is filled with positive attitude, I have not heard anyone speak bad about the company, a project or their boss.  Sure they grumble about the unexpected but overall, they are happy to be there.  My previous job was so plagued with negative energy and bad vibes that it would suck all happiness out of you when you walked into the office.

Things are looking so much better and while it was a tough road to get here, I am glad to be here.

What has made you happy lately?

Monday, March 26, 2012

Numbers in review

50 weeks since I have been laid off
25 calls to unemployment to claim my benefits
25 times that I felt shame to make those calls
4 the average number of hours per day that I spent looking at jobs, researching companies and applying
352 days that I cursed my previous company for being stupid
8 major job sites that I favored
8 sessions with an amazing career counselor
3 beasts that shared my days and forced me up early each and every day
Over 8 million Americans without jobs
1 recurring dream that I kept getting laid off
Countless tears of frustrations, anger, disappointment and sadness
4 Times I have been told I was a top candidate after an interview
98 minutes a one way commute to Milwaukee for an interview
15 minutes a one way commute to an interview in Chicago
17 pounds lost
1 Husband who was such a support while carrying a burden on his shoulder
2 families who were rooting for me
Too many to count friends who let me vent, made me laugh took me out for a cup of coffee, skyped, IM and hoped for and with me

18 days ago that I got an amazing job offer
1 great job landed
1st day of work under my belt

and now I can breath

Monday, March 05, 2012

Testing 1-2-3

Time is just moving by and it has been a while since I had the urge to write something.  Things are on a bit of an upswing for me.  While  I am still not working, I have had some momentum and some balls in the air.  This has helped pull me out of "the sads"* and has given me a new dose of energy that is propelling me forward.

I have been keeping busy as a new board member for a local non-for profit.  It is a dance company that my neighbor founded and I have been to a number of their shows and was so impressed and moved by their dances and shows that I was honored to be asked to be part of their board.  So, I am learning the ropes of grant research and writing and fundraising.  It has kept me busy and my skills sharp.  The next show is in April and there is so much to work on.

There have been some disappointing bits as well.  I have lost something with some friends, it is hard to say what that something is because I really can't put my finger on it.  At the core of it, communication must have broken down.  I am at a bit of a loss of what to do next.  A few good friends have put it in perspective and as one said "Priorities shift" and perhaps that is it.  Perhaps it is because it appears that I don't have the resources to participate in activities that we used to or perhaps it is another reason.  All I know is that I have put it out there and we shall see how things pan out.

What is new with you?

Friday, January 27, 2012

Still here?

I do We-Verb then disappear for almost a month.  Part of it was holiday recovery, part of it was due to some disappointing news, part of it was because I was fighting with the insurance company and part of it was I had other things to focus on.

The job that I alluded to in December is on hold.  I got the news before the new year and it shook me up.  Thus began the whole process over again with a bit more tears, frustration and self-doubt.  Right now, I am falling down the proverbial rabbit hole.  My stress level is high, I am constantly worried and frustrated, I am hard on myself and internally saying horrible things.

This is one situation that I can't control and even though I focus on good, it is this fear that can stop me in my tracks.  I hate this so much.