Friday, August 12, 2011

Facing the uncertain reality

I have a tolerance for small doses of patience. I can sit patiently at the DMV or the doctors office. when they are running late but, sitting around waiting for the phone to ring is something that is running my patience down.

Since April I have had a number of interviews or rather conversations with recruiters. Some pop up with this great job that I would be perfect for and then I never hear back or I hear back get an interview with the client and never hear back or I hear back with some opportunity that turns into a dead end. I have had a handful of interviews all but one has been a result of my applications directly to the source rather than a recruiter.

But every conversation or interview ends with, we'll let you know in about two weeks. Most of the time they disappear off the face of the planet or respond with the position was dropped or the position was filled after I call or email.

I have been getting calls since the beginning so my resume is doing its job. But nothing has happened and I am losing my patience. Or rather it is fear, fear of not paying my bills, not contributing to the house hold, not being able to participate in activities. It has been hard and upsetting. Each day I sit down and spend hours on job boards, applying (and in some cases re-applying) for positions, reaching out to network contacts and just getting sadder and more panicked at the end of the day.

There have been weeks that I get out of the house to go to the gym or run errands and other weeks that I don't (Partly thanks to a really sprained wrist that still has not healed after a month). I think in terms of goods rather than money, for example, a shirt that I see for sale is worth a portion of my grocery bill or gas or prescription costs. My attitude towards spending money has gotten so conservative. When my car got broken into, I cried more for the fact that I have to pay to get the glass replaced and that money was embarked for a bill.

Things are going to change in a month when the income is tighter. In my mind, I have a list of expenses that I can cut or reduce to cover the bills. My upcoming vacation is just going to be me on the beach. I can't afford to take the paddleboard classes or snorkel adventures that I was looking forward too. And it upsets me but, it is the reality of being unemployed.

Who knows maybe one of my recent interviews will turn into job position. But I have to be ready for them not to and work on my plan B. In April, I did not expect to still be here jobless but more so I did not expect to be depressed and on the verge of panic attacks either.


Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

First of all, I think recruiters are a crapshoot. Whether they are worth your time or not depends on what kind of industry you're in. I always found recruiters in my industry to talk big and deliver small.

Second, the unfortunate state of our economy means people are unemployed longer (boo) and companies with openings are inundated with resumes. Try not to take things personally when it comes to communications (HR people are slammed) and don't feel bad about following-up ... you're entitled to know the status of a job you interviewed for.

Finally, have you considered taking on a part-time job? Could be related to your field if small jobs can be contracted out. Or could be totally unrelated. I always tell friends in your situation to get a job at a place you spend money, because not only will you bring home some extra $$, but you'll also get discounts for the things you already buy. So, maybe you work a few hours at the grocery store or a coffee shop. It'll get you out of the house and might help improve your energy levels and your outlook.

KT said...

Don't ever feel bad about following up on a job interview (as long as you are not calling daily). It shows the employer that you are interested in the position enough to call and check on the status.

I'm sorry that you haven't been able to find anything yet. Have you ever asked any of the HR people why you didn't get the job? Maybe they can give you a tip or two for your next interview!