A fearless rotation around the sun

There are dates on the calendar that make you navel gaze, New Year's, anniversaries and birthdays.

Yesterday was my birthday and it was low key a lovely.  Last year I spent my day learning to paddle board and floating in the Pacific ocean, yesterday I had a number of meetings, conference calls and dealing with a major project crisis.  While I would have loved to be back floating under the palm trees, I am glad I spent my birthday at work.  It has nearly been six months since I started and each day I am glad that I have an office to drive to and more importantly a pay check that magically appears every other week.

My job is not perfect but, every day I learn something new.  I was welcomed into the fold by my team mates and work with some smart people.  But the best part was my recent review where my boss said that I am fearless that I jumped in and did not look back, that I make the job look easy even though it is not.

how freaking awesome is that to be called fearless!

So "fearless" is my word for this next rotation around the sun.  So here I come!

Another summer

Summer has been turning into a whirlwind and I can't complain.  We have packed our weekends with BBQs, parties, girls nights out, dinner with friends and just hanging out having a few drinks with our neighbors.  T and I looked at each other last week and decided that we need to make time and just sit with our feet in the sand and finally spent an afternoon on the beach!

While there has been the good there has been some sad, there has been some friends who have experienced loss, some illness and some loss.  I have had some downs that hit me but, I had too much going on than sit and worried.  As things start to wind down, I am facing a situation that I just need to face and deal with but, I have been dealing with it better this year than I would have last.  While my job is not perfect, it has given me an outlet to do what I do best and I am being appreciated and complimented.  Since I am not having to worry about  finding a job or what it means if I don't have one, I can focus more energy on looking at things differently.

I find myself more forgiving (especially of my faults and "sins"), appreciating my family, appreciating those friends, pushing out of my comfort zone and just more accepting of fate.

I can't say how long my zen will last but, It is a good place to be right now.

Just a peek into summer

I look back at last year or last summer and this summer and I am just so happier here and now.  The job is going great, I have got a number of '"good jobs" form co-workers and my boss that I feel like I am contributing to the team and the company.  I am still trying to grasp it all but, I have learned that you can't see the entire picture or you will go cross eyed, you just have to break it out by sections.  

I am enjoying my summer a lot more even if it is just two days weekends.  We have been spending time out like seeing Kevin Smith and Stephen Merchant.  Or outside, eating dinner on our porch with our neighbors until it is pitch black.  My little garden is looking pretty and well basically is not dead yet.

We have a lot to look forward this summer and I finally feel up for it.

And the slow race through summer begins

We have been having many whirlwind weekends, the kind where you can't really catch your breath.  It is hard to cram so many things in a two day period.  This past weekend, after talking about it for years (really two years) we finally painted our bedroom.  We have been looking for the perfect for us gray and we finally found it.  So in two and a half days we painted, touched up, painted the baseboards, touched up and moved most of the stuff back in.  Granted we also spent time hanging out on the back porches with our neighbors and may have gone to a wine tasting event during the days too.

We have accumulated so much stuff and I am in such a purge mood that not everything that was in our bedroom is back, we have a few piles in our living room of things to go through and keep or toss.  I am getting a bit stressed because my house is not put back together.  I feel like a mini hoarder right now.

But you can only eat an elephant one bite at a time and so we will have it all done by this weekend.

It is just the start of summer for us.  We are planning what we want to do, concert tickets have been purchased, trip discussions are still in discussion, annual BBQ party are being planned.  Plus there is always going to be time for the unexpected event that pop up.

I am ready for summer

Are you excited for summer, what are your plans?

Lovely

I was given this award from KT

1.       Share who gave you this award with a link back to their blog

2.       Write down 7 random facts about yourself.

3.       Give this award to 15 other bloggers.

4.       Let them know they have won.

5.       Pop the award on your blog.

So as far as my 7 random facts:

1-I don't eat seafood nor fish.  If it lived a portion of its existence in water, I don't eat it.  I had some bad experiences as a kid when it came to seafood and that colored my view.  I can't stand the smell or site of fish, my husband can only make fish when I am not home and has to do his dishes before I get home.  It has turned into a joke between us.

2-I have never read the Twilight books, Hunger Games nor Harry Potter.  The first two did not appeal to me but I do want to read Harry Potter.  The reason I have not read it so far is that I have no patience to wait for new book so I wanted to read the series back to back.  I plan to read the series soon, there is a particular method to the madness.

3-My dream is to have a bunch of animals, not just a few more dogs or cats but I really want a pig, a pygmy goat and a mini horse.  My father still tells a story about when I was about 2 they took me to a petting zoo and I fell in love with the pigs.  Apparently, I cried all the way from CT to NY because I had to leave the piglets at the farm.

4-I can organize other people's things but when it comes to organizing my stuff I get so overwhelmed. I have to get over that so I can re-my closet.  I think I need someone else to bounce a few ideas off of to kick it into gear.

5-I love to plan vacations, when we went on our honeymoon I had things planned, places to visit and areas to explore.  But when we went to Hawaii both times, the planning was more laid back.  We did a bunch of fun things but spent a lot of time just sitting on by the pool or beach.  My family vacations were always go go go, we never had a relaxing vacation so it was hard to get used to.  So we are planning vacation 2012 so many places to consider!

6-My latest beauty obsession is nail polish.  I have been splurging on a few colors and have been painting my nails every week.

7-Since i started my job, i have started to miss hitting the gym.  Granted my company has a gym but my days are hectic.  On average I have three meetings a day, one day last week I had seven.  So trying to find time during the day is tough.  But once I get my laptop, I will have so much more flexibility!!

As far as passing it on, I pass it on to you, those few that still read me.  Thank you for reading over these past few years, lately i have been quieter than I used to be.  So thanks for sticking by me!

Escencia

Chicago readers, what are you doing next Saturday.  How about coming to see this amazing dance troupe preform with some of their students and other dance troupes.  Piel Morena will be debuting a new piece that I personally can not wait to see.

The theme of the evening is what is essence?  What makes essence a part of us, the human experience, as individual and as part of a culture.

Tickets are only 15 dollars and can be purchased here and if you do go, please let me know so that I can say hi!

But in the meantime, how do you define essence?

These past weeks

It has been a busy three weeks just getting back into the swing of things and finding a routine and the weekends have been packed with the combo of errands, chores and fun activities.

These past few weeks we have been working to find the balance of work and life activities.  I have been in the "get organized" mood and have been thinking up plans to get things taken care of.  On top of the  thins we are planning to do around the house.  We finally got a screen door installed last weeks and are going to paint our bedroom and possibly the living room.  So we are narrowing down the colors and the weekend in which to get it done.

Working has given me such motivation to do things especially the ones that have been on the 'to-do list" for a while.

It is getting exciting, I am feeling inspired.

Week one

I was so excited last week to get back into the swing of working again.  I thought that I would be more nervous but really, I could not wait to get back to work.  The office complex that I now work in is huge like 12 buildings huge spread out.  In the summer they have a rent a bike to bike to the various offices around the campus!

My new building was also a bit of a challenge to get used to and find my way from my desk to the cafeteria or the conference rooms.  The first two days I got lost leaving the office and trying to find the right parking lot.  Since then , I carpool with my husband since he works 10 minutes away and only have to worry about finding my way out well the days he does not work from home.

Overall, I still feel like the newbie but, my team was been very welcoming, my boss has been more like a mentor than a boss and I am feeling thankful and lucky that I landed this position.  The company is great, the benefits are 'slap your momma' good and I am working again and that feeling is priceless.

I am ready to get my hands dirty, to learn about an entirely new industry and just go.  So far my week shave been filled with meetings and training sessions, I have not had any downtime but I love that!  The culture is so night and day from my last place, it is filled with positive attitude, I have not heard anyone speak bad about the company, a project or their boss.  Sure they grumble about the unexpected but overall, they are happy to be there.  My previous job was so plagued with negative energy and bad vibes that it would suck all happiness out of you when you walked into the office.

Things are looking so much better and while it was a tough road to get here, I am glad to be here.

What has made you happy lately?

Numbers in review

50 weeks since I have been laid off
25 calls to unemployment to claim my benefits
25 times that I felt shame to make those calls
4 the average number of hours per day that I spent looking at jobs, researching companies and applying
352 days that I cursed my previous company for being stupid
8 major job sites that I favored
8 sessions with an amazing career counselor
3 beasts that shared my days and forced me up early each and every day
Over 8 million Americans without jobs
1 recurring dream that I kept getting laid off
Countless tears of frustrations, anger, disappointment and sadness
4 Times I have been told I was a top candidate after an interview
98 minutes a one way commute to Milwaukee for an interview
15 minutes a one way commute to an interview in Chicago
17 pounds lost
1 Husband who was such a support while carrying a burden on his shoulder
2 families who were rooting for me
Too many to count friends who let me vent, made me laugh took me out for a cup of coffee, skyped, IM and hoped for and with me

18 days ago that I got an amazing job offer
1 great job landed
1st day of work under my belt

and now I can breath

Testing 1-2-3

Time is just moving by and it has been a while since I had the urge to write something.  Things are on a bit of an upswing for me.  While  I am still not working, I have had some momentum and some balls in the air.  This has helped pull me out of "the sads"* and has given me a new dose of energy that is propelling me forward.

I have been keeping busy as a new board member for a local non-for profit.  It is a dance company that my neighbor founded and I have been to a number of their shows and was so impressed and moved by their dances and shows that I was honored to be asked to be part of their board.  So, I am learning the ropes of grant research and writing and fundraising.  It has kept me busy and my skills sharp.  The next show is in April and there is so much to work on.

There have been some disappointing bits as well.  I have lost something with some friends, it is hard to say what that something is because I really can't put my finger on it.  At the core of it, communication must have broken down.  I am at a bit of a loss of what to do next.  A few good friends have put it in perspective and as one said "Priorities shift" and perhaps that is it.  Perhaps it is because it appears that I don't have the resources to participate in activities that we used to or perhaps it is another reason.  All I know is that I have put it out there and we shall see how things pan out.

What is new with you?

Still here?

I do We-Verb then disappear for almost a month.  Part of it was holiday recovery, part of it was due to some disappointing news, part of it was because I was fighting with the insurance company and part of it was I had other things to focus on.

The job that I alluded to in December is on hold.  I got the news before the new year and it shook me up.  Thus began the whole process over again with a bit more tears, frustration and self-doubt.  Right now, I am falling down the proverbial rabbit hole.  My stress level is high, I am constantly worried and frustrated, I am hard on myself and internally saying horrible things.

This is one situation that I can't control and even though I focus on good, it is this fear that can stop me in my tracks.  I hate this so much.

#31 Forsee

Where do you hope to be on Jan 1, 2013?


Sometimes I do wish that I had a crystal ball to see what will happen but, life is an adventure.  But there are a few things that I can say that will probably be true this time in 2012.  I hope to focus on being happy, to be in a meaningful job, to continues on working towards a happy and positive relationship with my husband.  I would love to travel and see friends and family more than I did this year.  


It is really the simple just focus on the small things that mean so much.  Cheesy yes, but it is the way that I want to look at things.


So as this is the last Weverb11, I want to thank those who were on this adventure with me.  I met some amazing bloggers that I plan to continue to peek in.  Special thanks to the regular readers who also provided support as I did this challenge.


I wish you all a very Happy and Healthy New Year!

#30 Meditate

Were you happy with who you were in 2011? Who do you want to be in 2012 and beyond?


Yes and no.  This year consisted of a number of pity parties, feeling sad, useless and unwanted mostly due to the unemployment and some outside factors.  I tend to see the proverbial glass as half empty so that feeds into the way that I see myself. 


A few months ago, I just had to get out of that mind set, so I started to think of a few things that make me happy and thankful.  It helped me pull out of a rut and focus on what I do have rather than what I don't have.


In 2012, I want to work on seeing the glass as half full and to be nicer to myself.  It is a work in progress for sure

#29 Gush

Begin to create a plan for “My friends day out 2012″ – tell us what you envision


When I saw this prompt, I thought of one person my friends who lives in NYC.  While I can say it would be so much fun to heal to NOLA or Miami or even Vegas the reality is simpler.  There is a good possibility that I will have to have some medical procedures in 2012 and my good friend has already told me that she is coming in to hang out during the recovery.  So while we will spend time in Chicago before, afterwards it will just be movies in our sweats.  


If I don't need the procedures then maybe we can think big.  We all just want to hang out and laugh!

#28 Pay it Forward

Describe a random act of kindness that you benefited from in 2011. How will you pay it forward in 2012?


Earlier in the year, a pin fell off of my watch.  So I went to a local jeweler and they put a new pin in, the charge was $5.  I handed him my debit card but their machine broke, so he said just take it and enjoy (even after I offered to go to the ATM).  I now have  a place where I will support when  jewelry needs to be fixed.  


I try to pay it forward it can be the simplest thing from holding open a door.  I also pick up things that have fallen in stores, if you have a few things at the grocery store I will let you in front of me.  I hope to be able to buy someone's coffee behind me at the drive thru though


.

#27 Spend

Where did your money go this year? Where do you want it to go in 2012?


We were cautious with money this year and only plurged on a new bedroom set in the beginning of 2011.  We saved a bit and only bought essentials like food, gas, pet food and necessary items.  The end of the year had us hitting some sales and getting a new living room couch and chair.  


Having  garage sale brought in a bit of cash that was used as vacation fun money.


For 2012, we want to save, save, save.  We also want to invents in our condo and are looking to add a humidifier, a screen door, paint for our bedroom and possibly refinish the floors.  But, they can be done in stages and none of it is essential.  The rest will be added to our saving account to build it up.  We have  goal in mind for 2012 and we hope to meet it!

#26 Revive

Share a favorite photo from the past year. What was happening behind the scenes? What were you thinking or feeling? What could you smell, taste, see, hear at that moment?

I took this shot in Hawaii after dinner with Hubs.  We had some cocktails and just spend the evening together.  Afterwards the two of us just wandered around the beach and took some more photos.   The sunsets in Hawaii are surreal and we were fortunate to stand on that beach at this moment to capture it!

#25 Celebrate

What did you celebrate in 2011? Are you looking forward to any celebrations in 2012?


This year we had a few celebrations, I had a "big" birthday, we celebrated my husbands "eve  of a big birthday" birthday, our anniversary and my neice's First Communion.  Each milestone was spent celebrating each occasion, my birthday was in Hawaii with my husband and friends, my husband's birthday was celebrated with his favorite dinner and cake with friends.


  Our anniversary was a weekend lon g celebration of our marriage.  The first communion was celebrated with almost all of my in laws in one place followed by a great celebration.


Of course today, we are celebrating Christmas just the two of us with the fur babies then we are off to celebrate with the in-laws.


Merry Christmas!!

#24 Control

What did you finally let go of in 2011? What will you let go of in 2012? It is still a work in progress and probably will continue on for the next few years but it is fear of the unknown.  I tend to over think things, over thinking leads to what ifs, the what ifs then turn into worries of what would i/we do if it does happen. I had to learn to just step back and take each day as it comes.  So that means that sometimes I just have to let go, other times it is ok to stress out, other days things just worked out. I hope that each of you have a very happy Holiday season!

#23-Grasp

Describe something that you actively engaged in learning to do this year.


Being unemployed forced me to pay attention to my skills and experience.  Every few months I updated my resume and in looking for a job it caused me to think and to refine it.  I also had to learn how to sell myself to companies, which is hard for me to do.  So I practiced interviews, went to a few networking events and eventually I got the hang of how to sell my self, highlight my skills and "read" an interviewer.


Entering 2011 it was not something I expected to learn but, I learned a lot.  2012 will be a bit of the same as I decide to get certified in my field.  


What did you grasp?