One step to knowing

I saw D.

I really did not think about it all day until I started to drive towards where we were meeting. I got thinking and I got a bit nervous . I was hoping that I would beat him there but he beat me. We started to walk towards each other and just stood there for a few moments looking at each other, I did not know what to do next and he leaned in to hug me. For one second it seemed that things were different but then my mind drew me back to the reality of the situation but it was nice to be hugged again.

The tears began to well up in my eyes and I blinked them away. It was strange at first and the conversation was strained but then we feel back into our conversation and talked and talked. I found myself avoiding eye contact with him because in the past we would just stare in each other's eyes and just talk. I did not want to remind myself how we were in the past because for as much as I suppressed it all, I still feel something for him.

We had a good chat (or at least I think so) and we made each other laugh and just caught up. It got hard to say bye to him. We hugged tightly and again I was brought back to the past and I could feel the tears but I kept reminding myself that things will be okay, they will be okay. We said our good-byes and I went one way and he went another.

The tears started as I walked towards my car and I turned around (which is one thing that I try never to do) and saw him walk away. I really do miss what we had but, I think that we can be friends, time heals and I will be okay...I will be okay...